How dare you.....

How dare you make me feel this way.
God why do we have these feelings and why do we tourue ourselves in making them time-in-timeout.
Why do I feel this way about some one that I will Probly never get to be with.
I want you... Do you want me?
We kiss and never see eachother naked.
We share the same bed but never lay as a couple in it.
Why do I feel these nasty feelings. I was happier when I was misserable.

I HATE THIS SHIT........

I hate the last week of College. Write this paper, do this assingment, study for the final, and blah blah blah blah. When this term ends I plan on getting so tore up I will need to take a week off just to recover from the hangover. If you are game leave a comment and we will work on a date.

P.s
Chris if Rachel goes and you offer her one drink I will cut you from ball sack to nose! Got me get me good!!!!!

Moveing on is not something humans do not do eaisly. If you have ever been in love or in a relationship for a length of time, you know what I mean. Few changes have occured not only in one of my close and personal friends life, but in mine as well. I have realized that I want more then great sex. I also found some one whom I thought I could be with. Alas, we have discovered that we can't; for reasons we know and that is how it will stay. I am not hurt but happy that my realtionship could end like that and I think the two of us will stay friends and maybe try it again at a later date. While the two of us were doing what we were doing I learned something about myself I did not know. I have the ability to love someone and not in a jealous way. I had no problem with this person doing there own thing at parites, because I too went off and did what I wanted to. I admit I enjoyed their company, but am not sad that the two or three week fling ended. It actually opened my eyes and taught me that love is something I want, but what I am still unsure of is this. Do I want to raise my children with a person or raise them on my own and then settle down as it were. I have no fear that I will do what I want in this life, well career wise that is. But the thought of me spending my life with an indvually and have to deal with them on a dailly bases is not something I want. Face it folks I do what I want rather people want me to or not. I just hate the thought of someone telling me that I can't spend my money the way I want. That is the biggest issue I have with a LTR (long term realtionship).

Hey Rachel if the two us are still single and living when we are, oh say, in our 70's what you say about gettin married and picking a retirement home together. We won't have to worry about sex, I'll be to old to do anything LOL!? Let me know.

This is not like me to post about something in the sky, but I have to tell you all what I saw. On, my way home last night I saw something in the sky. It hovered over my car for one min then it was gone. I mean completely gone, disappeared, into the sky. It was nothing I have ever seen. This is what I saw. A triangular "craft" with three white lights and one red light in the middle of the "craft". Granted, I do believe there is something out there, but I was just saying that so I would never see something. Then my cell phone battery randomly dies. It was fully charged. I just got done charging it the night before. If any body can explain and help me rationalize what I saw please leave my a comment.

I have this to say.............................

You fill in the rest.

Thy must cover thyns own ass. I have covered my ass this week. I am now an S.L. at work that means roughly $7 an hour and 30 hours a week. I still might have to look for a part time summer job just so I can pay off my cards and not worry about them. But I doubt that I will do that. I will be okay with making the min payments or a little more for a while. I figure when I go to SVSU I will get a student loan and pay all of that card off and not worry about. I figure as long as I can pay my rent, car, loan, and have enough money at the end of the month I will be fine. Well I am off to buy some new work clothes so I will catch y'all later.